Why did the programmer's wife leave him?
He didn't know how to commit.
I was gonna tell you a joke about UDP...
...but you might not get it.
Why do Java programmers wear glasses?
Because they don't C#.
Why dot net developers don't wear glasses?
Because they see sharp.
What's the best part about TCP jokes?
I get to keep telling them until you get them.
A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.
A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.
Why did the developer quit his job?
Because he didn't get arrays.
Why was the designer always cold?
Because they always used too much ice-olation.
To understand what recursion is...
You must first understand what recursion is
If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program
the rest of them will write Perl