Why do programmers prefer dark chocolate?
Because it's bitter like their code.
Why did the programmer go broke?
He used up all his cache
How do you generate a random string?
Put a Windows user in front of Vim and tell them to exit.
If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program
the rest of them will write Perl
What did the router say to the doctor?
It hurts when IP.
A SQL query walks into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks...
'Can I join you?'
Why did the developer go to therapy?
They had too many unresolved issues.
Why did the private classes break up?
Because they never saw each other.
Which song would an exception sing?
Can't catch me - Avicii
Why did the designer break up with their font?
Because it wasn't their type.