What do you call a computer mouse that swears a lot?
A cursor!
Why don't programmers like nature?
There's too many bugs.
The punchline often arrives before the set-up.
Do you know the problem with UDP jokes?
Why did the developer break up with their keyboard?
It just wasn't their type anymore.
A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.
A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.
3 SQL statements walk into a NoSQL bar. Soon, they walk out
They couldn't find a table.
Why did the programmer's wife leave him?
He didn't know how to commit.
What's the object-oriented way to become wealthy?
Inheritance
Why did the developer go broke buying Bitcoin?
He kept calling it bytecoin and didn't get any.
Why did the programmer go broke?
He used up all his cache