Why don't programmers like nature?
There's too many bugs.
Why was the designer always cold?
Because they always used too much ice-olation.
Why was the font always tired?
It was always bold.
I was gonna tell you a joke about UDP...
...but you might not get it.
The punchline often arrives before the set-up.
Do you know the problem with UDP jokes?
Why did the programmer always carry a pencil?
They preferred to write in C#.
Why do C# and Java developers keep breaking their keyboards?
Because they use a strongly typed language.
What's the object-oriented way to become wealthy?
Inheritance
3 SQL statements walk into a NoSQL bar. Soon, they walk out
They couldn't find a table.
Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up?
Because DEC 25 = OCT 31