Why did the functions stop calling each other?
Because they had constant arguments.
I was gonna tell you a joke about UDP...
...but you might not get it.
Which song would an exception sing?
Can't catch me - Avicii
Why was the designer always cold?
Because they always used too much ice-olation.
Why don't programmers like nature?
There's too many bugs.
A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.
A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.
What is the most used language in programming?
Profanity.
Where do programmers like to hangout?
The Foo Bar.
Hey, wanna hear a joke?
Parsing HTML with regex.
Why was the font always tired?
It was always bold.