Why did the developer quit his job?
Because he didn't get arrays.
What's the best thing about a Boolean?
Even if you're wrong, you're only off by a bit.
How do you generate a random string?
Put a Windows user in front of Vim and tell them to exit.
How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None that's a hardware problem
The punchline often arrives before the set-up.
Do you know the problem with UDP jokes?
Why would a guitarist become a good programmer?
He's adept at riffing in C#.
Why did the developer break up with their keyboard?
It just wasn't their type anymore.
Why do Java programmers wear glasses?
Because they don't C#.
A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.
A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.
Why did the programmer's wife leave him?
He didn't know how to commit.