What is the most used language in programming?
Profanity.
What did the router say to the doctor?
It hurts when IP.
Why did the programmer always carry a pencil?
They preferred to write in C#.
Why did the programmer always mix up Halloween and Christmas?
Because Oct 31 equals Dec 25.
There are 10 types of people in this world...
Those who understand binary and those who don't
How do you generate a random string?
Put a Windows user in front of Vim and tell them to exit.
What’s the object-oriented way to become wealthy?
Inheritance.
What's the best part about TCP jokes?
I get to keep telling them until you get them.
A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.
A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.
Why do programmers prefer dark chocolate?
Because it's bitter like their code.