Why do C# and Java developers keep breaking their keyboards?
Because they use a strongly typed language.
Why would a guitarist become a good programmer?
He's adept at riffing in C#.
What do you call a computer mouse that swears a lot?
A cursor!
I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory.
They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.
What's the best thing about a Boolean?
Even if you're wrong, you're only off by a bit.
How do you comfort a designer?
You give them some space... between the elements.
Why was the font always tired?
It was always bold.
A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.
A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.
Why was the JavaScript developer sad?
He didn't know how to null his feelings.
Why was the designer always cold?
Because they always used too much ice-olation.